Archive for July 5, 2007

Top Ten List of Love?

July 5, 2007

He must be rich.
She has to be pretty.
He must be smart.
She must be cute.
He must have a great career.
She must dress well.
He must be handsome.
She must be adored by others

Have you heard of these before? These criteria seem to formulate themselves in a person’s mindset when it comes to searching for a partner.

As a result, it becomes a quest to tick off a checklist of characteristics of people they meet, hopefully to pick the one that fulfills most of the items on the list.

Perhaps you find that the person fulfills your top ten requirements for a partner, then ask yourself how much you care for that person, and in what way?

Considering further, as you look around the potential love, you will find out soon enough although that person does not even fit into that top ten requirement, you’d love him/her anyway.

If you love a person, got into a relationship with him, yet still hoping that he will fulfill the top ten, then you will experience dissatisfaction. Perhaps you will be constantly attempting to change the person to become what your list demands. Its like reality versus ideal.

But that’s not him/her.

Why not drop your top ten and focus on your affection for him or her instead. In this way, no matter he/she fits any top ten or not, both of you will still be happy together… because you focus on the love instead of the list.

Lists don’t matter, love does…

It’s Not How Much You Know…

July 5, 2007

In relationships, we have many people who await to discover more about the other person before they take courage to start that relationship.

“I’ve got to be sure that person is suitable for me first.”

“I’ve got to know him or her better.”

My response is, “so what if you know him/her better?” Does it really make you love him/her more? Perhaps so. Or Not.

It’s not how much you know about that person, but how much you care about him

It could be potential love if you.. care about what you know about him, and care even more about what you DON’T KNOW about him.

You see, love is not about the knowledge, it’s really about the affection, hence, the care and the concern for that someone. It stems from that emotional end.

Instead of wondering how much you know, learn to know how much you care.

Independence Day

July 5, 2007

It was the Fourth of July yesterday, and it is also known as Independence Day to United States. A celebration and a marking of independence from Great Britain’s rule since 1776.

As USA remembers its day of freedom, I take it up as my day of reflection.

At times, though the physical body is independent, the mind is still far from it. To some, their thoughts and perspectives are still tied to former worn-out ideals, unable to be free from the chains of mental bondage, shackles of thinking restrain.

Some completely submit themselves to the compelling culture rather than learning to think for themselves. Its not be blamed though. I’ve always said, “The culture is stronger than the individual.”

Before you become independent, its a lot more important to have the following beforehand:

* the willingness to pay for the cost of independence.

* a plan for self-sufficence.

* the network to make your life work.

* the mental tenacity to see and chart a new direction.

* the character of guts and will to sustain you.

Its always useful to self-reflect on our lives to gauge to what degree are we truly independent, free to make our own choices and to carve our own destiny. To excel beyond, hopefully.

Our level of independence will let us know the amount of personal control we have over our own lives and hence chart the direction to where we are going.

Happy Independence Day!