How You Can Speak With Confidence? 10 Proven Ways To Take Your Speaking Skills Higher Than Ever!

I’ve always enjoyed sharing about confidence. It’s such a simple concept yet so difficult to apply. (from what the audience shared, at least) It’s especially more so when applied to public speaking. Many people do comment that the image of possible humiliation by the audience do “bug” them. Others are simply at a loss for words to describe that lack of confidence.

Yesterday at my talk, we addressed that issue. “How to Speak With Confidence?” turned out to be fun (and I mean extremely) and very interactive. The audience went crazy and they cheered for the speakers like they were superstars!

The lack of confidence is really an issue of focus. Whenever people “suffer” from a lack of confidence, it’s because they have been focusing things like:

How do I say?

What do I say next?

Will the audience laugh at me?

What if I fail?

How will they look at me?

Where I am going my face?

How am I going to face others in future?

All these are not really questions of resources; they are mere Expressions of Incompetency under the guise of questions. Questions of Resources MOVE you FORWARD, not stifle you with worse outcomes.

On top of this, it’s the past Patterns of Negative Habits at work. These patterns are results of negative culture, behaviors and observations of others. Hence, the mind goes into a vicious Cycle of Beliefs. One major cycle of beliefs is as follows:

”I’ve seen lousy speakers à the audience were bored à the audience insulted the speaker à the speaker was humiliated à he is lousy à therefore if I speak, the same will happen à it has happened before so it will happen again à the audience will be bored à they will humiliate me à I will be hurt à I don’t want to be hurt à I don’t want to hurt forever à since I am so lousy therefore I shall not speak à why? Because I have seen lousy speakers à (Back to the beginning of the cycle)”

As the cycle goes on, the Beliefs will be come more solidified and reinforced in the mind as The Truth. The Cycle of Beliefs will thus be practiced as Cycle of Behaviors. And over time, it becomes a Cycle of Habit.

All these are results of a person going Down-time, meaning they focus way too much on themselves that their internal dialogue. A more useful way is to be Up-time, where you should focus more on the external and surround elements.

 Hence, in order to truly speak with confidence, you can apply the following points:

1. Break the pattern of negative habits.

2. Focus on your audience, not what they think of you.

3. Focus on your message for your audience.

4. Focus on the higher values for your audience.

5. Understand that the speech it’s for your audience, not you.

6. Speak for your audience, it’s not you. Craft your speech to their listening ears and curious sight.

7. Establish your credibility.

8. Earn their respect.

9. Shape their mind and hearts when you’ve got credibility and earn their respect.

10. Inspire them to the higher purpose.

Public speaking with confidence is a continuous path of learning and growing. Work on the points by applying them in your next speech. Take yourself further as you excel beyond excellence!

Explore posts in the same categories: Communication Competence, Excel Beyond Excellence, Perspectives, Presentation Dynamics, Public Speaking Success, Reflection and Thoughts

5 Comments on “How You Can Speak With Confidence? 10 Proven Ways To Take Your Speaking Skills Higher Than Ever!”

  1. […] You can read the rest of the article by clicking here. […]

  2. Jason Says:

    I really enjoyed your article. I’ve posted a link to it from my blog. Thanks for that.

  3. Wekie Says:

    Hi Jason, Thanks for dropping by my blog. Glad you found it useful.
    Be well and always excel beyond excellence!

  4. Yetti Chiu Says:

    Hi Wekie,

    I really enjoyed your today’s talk on “How to Power Up Your Speaking Skills with Your Mind”.

    We have lots of fun! At the same time, the participants have some useful things to bring home too.

    I think you have mentioned some points which are similar to what you have described in this article.

    Thanks again! : )


    Club President 2007-2008
    Kowloon-Singapore Toastmasters Club

  5. Wekie Says:

    Hi Yetti,

    Thanks very much for being at the talk and I am glad you’ve had fun. The purpose was to make the session educational and entertaining.

    Yes, indeed, this blog provides various information, tips and strategies so that people can excel in their lives.

    Be in touch and see you around.
    Keep excelling beyond excellence!

    With warm wishes,

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