Archive for the ‘Living Life’ category

Ignore Them At Your Own Risk! Exploring The 5 Essence Of Managing Your Conflicts Without Making Them Worse

November 12, 2008

As I approached this training topic over the past 2 days, I’ve derived even more ways of handling conflicting situations and tough people. What I’ve always liked about “Conflict Management” workshops are the freshness and renewed challenges that keep presenting themselves.

What did I do? I basically encouraged the participants to explore the tough conflicts with me.

And throughout these interactions, I helped them to design the different approaches that they can use whenever the conflicts arise. It’s never a quick hit-and-run solution if you want to get to the root of the issue, but there are truly some words and approaches that can put you in a more positive light.

Do reflect and consider the following essence of conflict management:

1. When people get angry, they are exhibiting a inner set of conflicting values. These values often, though not always, have been accumulated over time. You want to recognize that in you.

2. Conflicting people want to be heard, and seriously do not appreciate receiving any condescending treatment.

3. They are also seeking support of some kind for their points of views. Notice when the areas of similarity might be for both your viewpoints.

4. These people have either an overly high or overly hurt ego of some kind and want to assert it unto people around them. Handle their egos with care!

5. Avoid getting too carried away to prove yourself right, because that’s exactly what conflicts can get you to do — get carried away and your conflict escalates.

(Source: wekie.com)

How To Integrate Leadership Communication Into Your Interaction With People

November 9, 2008

I completed the first segment of the training yesterday with a sense of satisfaction. Although it was Saturday, I was glad the participant-leaders were able to be dedicating their time to better themselves. After all, this course “Communication and Problem Solving for Leaders” was specifically customized for them.

We had a fair bit of in-depth discussion on what it meant for a leader to communicate. I call this “Leadership Communication”. The participants understood that the manners and style of communication were also very much affected by the leader’s personality. Hence, I was pleased when the leaders were able to integrate the various concepts into their practice.

When we explored the concepts of leadership communication, we also derived various ways of displaying them at work.

Here are some of them:

1. Understand how your staffs prefer to interact and communicate.

2. Discuss with them your corporate goals with values and how you are going to lead them to fulfill these objectives.

3. Seek to inspire them by communicating trust in their capabilities.

4. Remember that one key element of communication is listening, active listening.

5. Let your staff know that you understand them by communicating with empathy and your willingness to adopt possible, workable ideas.

(Source: wekie.com)

Top 10 Reasons Why Your Brain “Malfunctions” Whenever You Need It To Work Most

November 3, 2008

You’ve been through this before. It was crunch time. Your future depended on it. Your happiness came down to this crucial moment. The turning point of your life beckoned. It’s make it or break it time, do or die…

Yet as you cleared your throat to speak, nothing came out. It’s not that you’ve lost your ability to articulate. But your mind just went blank. Nothing came out of your mouth. Try as you might, your brain simply refused to conjure up the next piece of sensible information. It went on strike, right on the dot.

And it couldn’t pick a better time; especially when you are attempting that 10-points examination question to graduate, bracing yourself for that love confession sentence which you’re dying to utter, and of course, the moments of awkward public speech silence. It was still on strike.

Yes, your brain left you to hang… high and dry.

And here’s why your precious brain decides to leave for a short tea-break or ‘vacation’ whenever you need it to report for work:

1. You don’t understand or know your own natural biorhythm. I call this your PPPs, “Peak Performance Period”.

2. You’ve yet to learn how to focus on what motivates. As a result you give in to distractions, internally and environmentally.

3. Your own physical body does not acquire the sufficient or suitable nutrition to keep your brain working healthily.

4. You don’t have the right motivation and driving desire to propel yourself.

5. The lack of energy and rest makes us too tired for intensive mental work.

6. You got overwhelmed by the tasks and challenges that face you. You felt too ‘microscopically and atomically small’ for such a gigantic glorious mission that might change the history of mankind and the surface of the earth.

7. Anxiety, worry, frustrations, fear took over your mind and imagination instead of you being relaxed. The stress you experienced made your mind went ‘blank’

8. It’s the result of poor thinking and working habits you’ve, intentionally or un-wittedly, adopted over the years.

9. You have yet to master your mind to a reasonable, applicable level. The techniques of mind mastery and brain power continue to lie undiscovered for you.

10. You’ve never “wanted it to work” in the first place. You saw the act as a need and as an obligation instead of an all-inspiring purpose. Hence it’s because of your attitude towards the work.

(Source: wekie.com)

5 Relevant Reframes To Help You Reframe Your Problems

November 1, 2008

One of the most common encounters I have in my trainings is that I get asked with regard to how to solve problems. And these problems placed before me range from work-place issues, career conflicts, personal motivation blockages, social and romantic relationship queries, marital concerns, life threatening obstacles and the likes. It’s always refreshing and an useful brain exercise in quick thinking to guide them in reframing these problems.

Yesterday’s training “Reframing Problems Into Opportunities” dealt specifically with resolving problems itself. The participants opened up to share and we take another look into how problems can be perceived differently. Lots of interesting cases were thrown up, examined, diagnosed and possible future were presented to them. It was most mentally stimulating indeed.

Hence, here are some of the relevant reframes we discussed. When employed, they will enable you to better reframe your problems.

1. Everything you read, encounter and experience is an attempt at reframing the problems in your life.

2. See them as issues and situations, rather than as problems.

3. Understand that for every issue, there are at least 2 sides of the coins.

4. You can choose, if you choose to. Therefore, choose to choose first.

5. The key lies in the solutions you have, not the problems you are having.

(Just a quick point to add: If the problems in your life get too overwhelming or unbearable, please get a coach or mentor now. Talk to him or her immediately. Time is of the essence.)

(Source: wekie.com)

I Thirst For More

October 20, 2008

It’s often in learning that we progress. For today, an enthusiastic Toastmaster, Gerald Ong, sent me an article for posting. I’m sure the eager learners will be hungry for more and thirsting for more knowledge.

Here’s what Gerald had share:

I Thirst for More

Are you thirsty after having a spicy meal?

Are you thirsty for better speaking skills?

Do you hunger for more a lively club environment?

What should we do?

— Share the benefits of Toastmasters to the public!

Benefits of Toastmasters are:

— Unlimited opportunities for personal growth and career advancement

— Improved Abilities and Broadened experience

— Learning points in Leadership development through club administration and club management

— Self-Confidence and Self-esteem in public speaking

— Better interpersonal communication skills and human relationships

“If you can dream it, you can do it” — Walt Disney

Why do members leave the club?

— Commitments to other voluntary organizations

— Work Commitments

— Change of personal interests

— Family Matters

— Differences in club atmosphere as compared to their heydays.

“Altitude does wonders”

— Revive the atmosphere by involving your club coach, club mentors and club sponsors.

— Have a positive mindset. Nothing is impossible. Look at “impossible” as “I-M-Possible”

— With the right mindset, you can achieve anything you dream.

“Focus Bring Power”

When you are down, you will rise up at the end of the day. “Never bend your head. Hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye.” Helen Keller

Only time will tell that it would be successful.

A quote to ponder:

“The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt within the heart.” Helen Keller

With the right attitude, mindset, you can excel beyond excellence!

(Source: wekie.com)

5 Practical Ways To Build Up Your Quality Interpersonal Relationships And Network

October 16, 2008

When I completed the 2 day training on “Up Your Image with Power Dressing and Interpersonal Skills” yesterday, I had a strong sense of satisfaction and elation. I was truly happy to see how determined the participants were in wanting to make a progress change in their lives. They participated in the activities with enthusiasms and initiated several ideas of their own, from sharing how to relate with others to networking on their own.

I also liked how the class was filled with an air of tranquility and anticipated excitement, eager to go forth to make that change in their own lives. I look forward to hearing more news of how they have created even more positive relationships through their interaction with others.

Adding on, here are some of the ways that you can build your interpersonal relationship with quality and better tap on your network.

1. Maintain regular contact with each other.

2. Ensure that time is spent meaningfully.

3. Seek values agreement and acknowledgment of each other.

4. Show empathy and experience in your interaction.

5. Provide a chance for mutual progress in various aspects of your interpersonal relationships.

(Source: wekie.com)

How To Keep Your Mind Sane In The Face Of Financial Insanity?

October 13, 2008

Over these couple of weeks we keep hearing reports of people suffering from depression as a result of the world-wide financial turmoil. Indeed, there are such trying times where investors are caught off guard. The deep regrets and sense of loss over their depleted funds are indescribable.

In my recent personal coaching and consultations, there are several individuals who come to me as they have been experiencing this diabolical bout of depression and anxiety. They had difficulty geting over the loss of their hard-earned money.

Yet, no matter how bleak things may be. One must not lose their mind still. It’s the key thing you can depend on for now. This will hence demand from you a greater mental dexterity than before to tide over this uncertainty.

Do consider working on some of these ways to better enable a sane mind in the midst of these insane times:

1. Plan your day. Make it meaningful and live the day usefully.

2. Read from your favorite joke book. Better to take your mind into a world of joy than to go into the other extreme. Focus on the lighter side of life.

3. Meet your mentor. Have a talk with someone you respect and get some practical tips to handle crisis better.

4. Indulge in a new hobby. As you stay out of the market, why not take it as a time to do something you haven’t been getting down to? A new hobby will keep your life enriched.

5. Call a counseling hotline. Sharing with a stranger allows you to pour your hearts out. The trained counselor may just be the listening ear you need.

6. Work out your savings. Stay rational with your money management. You live to fight another day.

7. Meditate. Stay mentality calm. Peace out.

(Source: wekie.com)

Do You Have The 7 Characteristics Of The Self-Leader?

October 9, 2008

When a person exhibits a certain sense of leadership that you can hardly put your fingers down, he could be a Self-Leader. You will notice that he seems to get things done without the need to be pushed as well as building resources that are often useful and practical. He displays certain charisma that draws people to him and ultimately you know, if anyone’s to be on top, it’s him, He is The Self-Leader.

Here are the characteristics that make one a Self-Leader:

1. The Self-Leader is self-motivated.

2. He is grounded in his own values and foundations.

3. He is self-sufficient.

4. He is a self-starter in taking action.

5. He is manages his own emotions well.

6. He already has a plan and knows how and where to get things.

7. He is comfortable in communicating his needs, requirements and directions.

As you read through the list, you may want to reflect and discover if you are already one. No matter where you are in life, it’s never too late to start becoming a Self-Leader.

(Source: wekie.com)

How To Network And Communicate Your Way To Success With People?

October 8, 2008

I love the training over these 2 days! At my workshop on “Network and Communicate Your Way to Success”, we’ve interacted immensely, laughed heartily and discussed intensively the real life and relevant issues. Participations were strongly encouraged to express their viewpoints and demonstrate their networking abilities. Upon reflection, so much learning has taken place.

In addition, here are some of the ways to network and communicate with people who will help you towards your life path of success:

1. Seek to establish personal credibility and integrity.

2. Be receptive and open to different opinions and types of people you meet.

3. Maintain a fair balance of tact and diplomacy in your mannerisms.

4. Reciprocate in kind upon receiving recommendations and assistance.

5. Enhance your sense of personal touch, rapport and connection with people.

(Source: wekie.com)

If You Disagree With Someone…

October 5, 2008

It’s normal.

It’s human.

It’s a part of growing up.

It’s a portion of learning.

It’s a reflection of a lesson.

It’s how new worlds are defined.

It’s how new knowledge are acquired.

It’s how we get out of our comfort zone.

It’s how our dimensions are pushed beyond.

It’s how we escape from our mental ivory tower.

It’s how nations rise and fall, and rise again.

It’s how civilizations are torn and re-built.

It’s how progress for mankind is made.

It’s how we avoid becoming obsolete.

It’s how perspectives are expanded.

It’s how breakthroughs occur.

It’s just the way humans are.

It’s how we start to excel.

It’s just the way you are.

It’s just the way life is.

It’s life.

If you disagree with me,

Congratulations! Welcome to Life!

Source: wekie.com